Apparently, no one told the right that you're not actually supposed to root for the genocidal, totalitarian Galactic Empire. Comedian Walter Masterson found this out the hard way when he crashed a MAGA/Zionist joint protest (real meeting of the minds) in full stormtrooper garb, only for most of the protestors to not get the joke. — Read the rest

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Lego unveiled a slew of new Star Wars sets just in time for Star Wars Day, and the best droid in all of Star Wars is finally getting a plastic brick likeness. C1-10P, Chopper to his friends, the slightly unhinged, loyal, badass droid from Star Wars Rebels and Ahsoka, will be available as a smaller-scale set, matching the currently available R2-D2, not the larger, discontinued Technic version. — Read the rest

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Serendipity Books, a beloved shop in Chelsea, Michigan recently secured a lease on a larger space just 350 feet away. While that's a wonderful sign for independent bookstores everywhere, the question became how to most efficiently and affordably move nearly 10,000 books down the block. — Read the rest

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"You Wouldn't Steal a Car" was an anti-piracy campaign of the early 2000s, famously ineffectual and the target of many parodies. It has long been known the campaign exceeded the licensing terms of the music it used—pirated, you might say—and now analysis of the font shows it to be a replica of a commercial typeface designed by Just van Rossum—pirated, you might say. — Read the rest

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You know who thought up a subscription-based defense model in his book Starter Villain? FUCKING ME THAT’S WHO. That smug fascist owes me a percentage. I won’t get it, of course and if I did get it I would donate that shit to all the “woke” things he hates so fast it would make his brain swim.

Incidentally, national defense as an outsourced subscription is a horrible fucking idea, even when it’s not run by a billionaire dweeb strung out on ketamine and self-loathing. But the current administration is not what you would call smart, so.

This is not a great timeline, y’all.

(click on the headline to go to the actual story)

— JS

Mommy and Abruzzo, a pair of Western Santa Cruz Galapagos tortoises, are the proud parents of four hatchlings at the Philadelphia Zoo. Although their exact ages are not known, both parents are believed to be about a hundred years old. Mommy is the zoo's longest resident, living there since 1932. — Read the rest

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